


i found my home (in your arms)

by kozuefu



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Confessions, Drabbles, Family, Fukurodani - Freeform, I’m sorry (not really), Light Angst, M/M, Mentioned Bokuto Koutarou, Post-Time Skip, mcd isn’t strong just mentioned, they love each other hehe, widower
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:53:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28062735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kozuefu/pseuds/kozuefu
Summary: Lonesomeness is an emotion to which all humans —irrespective of who they are or where they live —know well. However, being blessed with family and/or friends may be capable of helping us through the adversity, preventing life itself from swallowing us whole.This specific emotion occasionally affects Keiji, a widower with two children who woefully lost his husband due to failure of procedure to temporarily cure his disease: coarctation of the aorta.-Or in other words, Keiji is introduced by putting on view of his mornings after his husband’s passing five months subsequent.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Comments: 3
Kudos: 9





	1. bittersweet distance

**Author's Note:**

> i’ve never done this before so pls spare me of some mercy —
> 
> if mistakes are found please don’t hesitate to point them out to me because this wasn’t beta lol.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve never done this before so please excuse my attempts at working this out —
> 
> no beta so please feel free to call me out on any mistakes. :)

Fluttering his eyes open, Keiji is met by the sun softly glowing a pretty golden through the drooped blinds above the bedroom windows as dust modes waft in the air.

He proceeds to drowsily rise to a sitting position, not paying mind to the soft comforter sliding down to his thighs. 

Swinging his legs over -- sleepiness still visible in his sluggish movements -- he places the lobes of his bare feet on the wooden floor and propels himself to stand.

He quietly strolls towards the clearly worn out wooden crib that's placed to the left of the bed to plant a soft peck on the sleeping form of a barely year old’s forehead.

And as if resembling a broken record, he begins his day exactly how he has for the past five months. 

Walking into the hallway outside his bedroom, Keiji comes across an already energetic toddler smiling brightly as she speeds towards him. 

Once she's on the tip of his toes, he gently runs his slender fingers across her slightly knotted locks and pecks her small forehead, followed by a ‘good morning pumpkin’. 

Giggling, she dashes back towards her room after messily trying to sputter a ‘good morning papa'.

He then starts to dawdle to a room off to the back of the residence. However, once he comes face to face with the door to said room, he becomes hesitant. 

So instead, he resides to run his fingertips through beautifully crafted, wooden designs, until he reaches the very offending copper knob. 

Slowly, Keiji turns it clockwise till a soft click fills his ears, allowing the door to creak open onto a room decorated in transparent, golden flecks of an early sunrise illuminating the small particles of dust swirling in the air. 

There were only two fairly sized curtain windows across from his right, both resembling an arched doorway -- both lowering far down towards the ground and reaching high to the ceiling.

Its white vinyl frame barely visible as the sun streams through its transparent surface. 

He blinked a few times in an attempt to help his eyes adjust to the gleaming rays that are too bright to look at, yet too bright to look away. 

And with bare soles, the widower slowly proceeds to enter the comfortably small, warm, white-walled room. 

A neutral tone decorated all four walls, each with a disordered array of mismatched bookshelves which held numerous dusty trinkets and literature -- each item clearly worn throughout the years. 

Above the shelves were dozens of affixed picture frames, each showing a different stilled memory.

Keiji sauntered towards them as a wave of reminiscence overflowed him. 

Depicted in each and every frame were precious family photographs of his children that never failed to bring him such pure joy along with memories of past times, birthday candles and family gatherings.

In others are wisps of sadness, the hints of unbearable adversities that were to come, the suffocating storms he has yet to navigate. 

In this space, taking in every memory upon all four walls and every shelf, its atmosphere became suffocating all at once. 

Such as a squall before a storm, dreadful thoughts began to flood his mind instantaneously, almost completely dominating his emotions. 

This has been a recurring theme lately for Keiji. The irregularly inescapable feeling of deep loneliness. 

A loneliness that is a vice upon his heart, squeezing with just enough pressure to become a constant ache. 

It kills him every day just a little bit more, taking what was once his inner light and replacing it with a darkness that overshadows each moment. 

It is the fuel of his nightmares, the reason he struggles to breathe when a new shock comes. 

And when friends and family feel like paper chains in the rain and the sky holds nothing but the promise of more storms, life is lonely. 

When all Keiji wants is to feel the warmth of his sultry palm against his tear-stained cheek or a reassuring embosom from his arms as they envelope his trembling body but is left with a world that becomes cold and empty;

A slow poison for the soul. 

It's times like this where he wishes he would simply drown in his sorrows or fade away with its vigorous winds, anything to stop the ever-present pain. 

Where is the limit? 

Because he yearns to know; he truly needs to know.

However, Keiji was not alone. 

The distant giggles and padding of feet across wooden floors from his daughter, along with the recollection of the inaudible ‘good morning’ he had expressed by gesture to his infant who was sleeping soundly in their crib the moment he woke up, validates as much.

And so as he takes one last glance around the almost solemn room before swerving on the ball of his feet to leave through the wooden door he had entered from moments before. 

Closing the door softly, Keiji catches a glimpse of his daughter as she twirled and pranced about in the kitchen, still in her sleepwear, with a broad smile on her small features and smiles tenderly.

I am not alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading !


	2. you're my comfort when the night falls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the night before Fukurodani plays against Ichibayashi for the Spring Interhigh Finals, Akaashi is found to be routinely watching various matches past midnight while Bokuto is sleeping soundly beside him — or so he thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was an entry for bokuaka week which i decided to pitched up last night and now we’re here lol — 
> 
> still no beta, we are too impulsive for such things hehe
> 
> enjoy :)

The dark room where the Fukurodani team is currently situated for the Spring Interhigh is currently filled with soft snores and resting teenagers from a long day of victories — apart from a certain setter. 

However, Akaashi — too invested on the tiny screen that is showcasing a match from a few hours prior to his past-midnight activities — fails to hear the rustling of sheets beside him until there's a familiar hand reaching out towards the small device in his palms.

Startled, he looks up with slightly wide eyes but is met with darkness until his eyes become adjusted to the sudden contrast. There before him is Bokuto with slight bed hair and droopy eyes filled with concern.

Akaashi is about to open his mouth in bewilderment when the older of the two beats him to it. 

"Hm, 'kaashi. what time is it?" There's a certain rasp to his voice that makes Akaashi feel cotton in his throat.

Glancing down, he notices Bokuto's palm still lightly placed on the screen, now paused from any movement from the miniature players he was observing not too long ago. He then gently lifted the older boy's hand and looked off to the far right corner to check the digits.

‘2:23 AM. Ah.’

"A quarter past twelve, Bokuto-san." He lied. 

That earned him a soft hum from the latter as he raised his other hand to idly rub at his eyes. 

'Just like a toddler' Akaashi thought to himself, amused.

Suddenly, Bokuto retracts his hand from his eyes and glowers at him. 

"It's not past twelve now is it, Akaashi?"  
He mentally scolds himself for not being able to stifle a flinch from the sudden accusation.

"Ah, no. My apologies for lying to you, Bokuto-san." Bokuto then slightly lowers his chin, skeptical of the younger’s response.

Bokuto closes his eyes with a released sigh and in a swift motion, confiscates the small device from the latter's fingers.

He then proceeds to softly place it to his right, far from the younger's reach. 'Ahh, he's mad at me.' 

As if to only prove his thoughts correct, the other's frown deepens as he turns back towards Akaashi.

And in an attempt to remove the falling strands of hair from his eyes, Bokuto runs his fingers through his ungelled monochrome locks. 

Akaashi suddenly becomes terrifyingly hyper appware as a pair of golden orbs focuses on him as the melting moonlight seeps through the hotel blinds behind him.

Instantaneously, without an ounce of hesitance, Bokuto opens his arms in a welcoming embrace. Akaashi is taken aback from the sudden act of affection, and so with widened eyes he remains seated.

"Don't leave me hanging 'kaashi. Now c'mere, you need some sleep in your system." He felt conflicted with how his heart begins to accelerate in his chest along with the sudden trembling of his fingers, but complies nonetheless.

So he proceeds to hesitantly crawl over the little distance they shared and plants himself in the warmth of Bokuto's arms. What he didn't expect was them both suddenly being dropped onto the pillow below. Nor the way Bokuto gently pulls the younger's head into the warmth of the crook of his neck.

Not only that, but the idle fumbling of calloused fingers within his raven locks along with the firm hold across his back was surprisingly soothing. 

And for the first time in years, Akaashi felt at ease under the soft glow of the moonlight -- could feel the grasp of slumber tingle his fingertips.

Moments passed until soft snores and slow, even, breathing overcame the two boys. And so did minutes, then hours and soon enough, the sun rose from its slumber and glazed its glowing form over the tall structures of the new morning city.

Whispers and snickering muffled by slumber could be heard but not paid mind to. Gentle movements as if to not wake a sleeping form disturbed him. His reaction being to chase after the warmth nearest to him; There were more giggling along with a soft hitch of a breath. 

“Uh, ‘kaashi. Hey, wake up it’s morning.” A gentle shove to his shoulder then a light poke to his cheek. The drowsy boy then scrunches up his features in annoyance and groans.

Fluttering his eyes open, he’s insulted by the brightness of the room — causing him to squint until his eyes adjusted. Once his vision begins to focus (at least as much as one in need of lenses could focus) upon the boy slightly above him. 

Scattered tresses of black and white cascades over said boy’s features; Swirls of golden orbs filled with an unrecognizable emotion. Dusted hues of pink adorned their nose and cheeks.

Suddenly reality hits him like a ball going at 100mph to his face and in a haste, rises to a sitting position.

Unfortunately, the boy — now known as none other than Bokuto, didn’t quite react in sync to Akaashi, causing them to painfully bump heads. Groaning, the two boys reached up to massage the area of impact in unison. 

More snickering. A sly comment. 

“Good morning lovebirds.” Now scattered laughter.

Bokuto grew flushed red to the tips of his ears and if Akaashi wasn't currently sporting the same hues on his own cheeks he would've thought it was adorable. 

An obvious bruise had begun to take form on the latter, he panics.

And in the midst of his panic, Akaashi rushes towards Bokuto — almost tripping on the thin comforter — and begins to apologize profusely.

“Oh no. I am so sorry, Bokuto-san. It was not my intention to hit you. Are you okay? Do you need something to soothe the pain?”

A pair of hands now on Bokuto’s cheeks begin to slightly tilt his head. Akaashi, completely unaware of the boy who is now flustered to no end, begins to rub soothing circles to his slightly bruised forehead. 

“Akaashi-“ Bokuto tried to muster, but his voice betrayed him by coming out an octave too high. Clearing his throat, he tries again.

“Hey, Akaashi. It’s okay, I'm alright. If you think a bump to the head is gonna knock me out then you underestimated me ‘kaashi.”

With that, Bokuto reaches up to take a hold of the other’s slender hands into his. He swallows at how much smaller his are compared to the younger’s but pushes all unnecessary thoughts into the depths of his brain.

“But-“

He shushes the latter with a gentle squeeze to their joined hands. Akaashi lowers his gaze to where the small gesture spiked his every nerve; his heart about to burst right then ‘n there.

“Hey. ‘kaashi, can you look at me, please?” Hesitantly, he complies and..

Oh.

The moment his eyes locked onto golden ones, he felt as if the world slowed down exponentially. He did not expect the adoration etched on Bokuto’s features that were so unknown to him. 

He especially did not expect those beautiful, round eyes to be so fixated on him.

As he gaped back at Bokuto in wonderment, the latter began to slowly remove one of his hands and continued on. “I’m okay, see?”

Bokuto then raised their joined hands to where they had impacted moments earlier and placed Akaashi’s palm to show there was no bump, nor blood. 

“You worry too much about me ‘kaashi. It’s not fair ‘cause you deserve the same care in return.” Bokuto trailed off as he looked off to the side, embarrassed.

“And maybe that’s why I offered for you to sleep next to me last night.” Bokuto then brought his gaze back towards him.

“Oh.. that’s.. I appreciate the sentiment Bokuto-san, truly.” He offers a small smile as to show he meant what he’d said. 

Bokuto’s eyes shined, content with Akaashi’s answer along with his signature broad smile that had no chance against the illuminating sun painting the team’s shared hotel room. 

He then lunged towards Akaashi in a hug before he could even decipher what had happened, making them both collapse onto the scattered covers and went quiet for a few seconds to then erupt into soft giggles. 

“I love you, ‘kaashi.” 

His breath hitches for a moment, processing what he’d just heard as he gapes towards the ceiling. Nonetheless, Akaashi subsequently smiles, warmly as he cast a glance towards Bokuto, who was now nuzzled against the crook of his neck.

“I love you too, Bokuto-san.”

“Fucking finally.” Konoha sighed, exasperatedly. The rest of the team erupted into amused laughter as they began to leave the room to allow the two boys some privacy after their not so quiet confession. 

Bokuto raises his chest after hearing the door shut to look into Akaashi’s eyes with a fond smile on his lips. 

“You mean it?” The boy looked down on him with hopeful eyes as he awaited his answer. He raises his hand to softly caress the cheek of the one above him and slowly brought the other boy’s forehead to his, closing his eyes in the process. 

“Always.” 

And as the sun decorates the fairly sized hotel room in transparent, golden flecks of an early sunrise, both boys silently bask in each other’s warmth.

A silent confession was shared in the early month of January. And what was to happen in the near future may be of a bitter taste, but in that moment, as they lay in each other's arms, nothing else seemed to matter. 

Just a star and their world. Together, through it all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading !

**Author's Note:**

> this is super short haha :’)
> 
> but apart from that, thank you for reading ! <3


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